Only a mothe r could love this liver
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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