I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
