just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize