just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
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