Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize