A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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