So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
