Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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