Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
