i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
