A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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