i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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