Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
