That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
