Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
