is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
You were trust falling into bushes
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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