listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
This house was built for laser tag.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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