he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
