I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
