i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
