Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
you inspire me to be a worse person
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize