Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
