Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
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