so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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