Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
