This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
