I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
We had sex on a dog bed..
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
