If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
