I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
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