bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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