drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
