Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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