RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize