where am i from again
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
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