Rock
Scissors
Fuck
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
