I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize