you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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