Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
