im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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