ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
just found out that she named her cat after me.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
