Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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