Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
