who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
