We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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