I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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