Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
