elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
