my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
