By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
