you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
