Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
